In a large mixing bowl, whisk together the mayonnaise, apple cider vinegar, BBQ sauce, Dijon mustard, sugar, grated onion, celery seed, smoked paprika, kosher salt, and cracked black pepper until the sugar is dissolved and the mixture is well combined.

Add the coleslaw mix to the bowl and toss to coat the vegetables evenly with the dressing.

Fold in the chopped parsley or cilantro. Adjust seasoning with additional salt and pepper if needed. Serve immediately or refrigerate until ready to serve.